43~The Only Girl In The World

I felt as if some sort of alternate universe as I made my way across Utah. This place was making me feel like I was the only girl in the world. More special than I had ever felt. I had an amazing morning in Zion, scaling Angel's Landing for the second time and had visited Bryce Canyon too. After my drive that had me absolutely mesmerised by the ever changing scenery, I had to find somewhere to sleep. It was getting dark and there was drizzly rain. I had contemplated driving far into the night but I would miss out on the walk in Calf Creek that had Dr O moved when he traversed the path and happened upon the final show of canyon waterfall. He and St Christopher were my guides and I remained in a restaurant, sampling the fried green tomatoes, apping with Dr O so I could work out my next move. He knew I would love Calf Creek. Stay put he told me. Do it in the morning. Luck was on my side. The small motel that had but 3 rooms, had one left and I headed to the rickety gas station/shop and bought m&m's and popcorn- I would live it up in these cute digs. Bath and then TV with snacks!

I rose early and saw whispers of a red sky in the distance. Low clouds hung over head.

I set out for Calf Creek. The drive back along the Scenic Byway in the Grand-Staircase Escalante National Monument was equally breathtaking (and a little bit frightening- so high up and one could just drive off the edge so easily, especially as the view and morning sky was rather distracting). I was so alone in this vast world, my hike exemplifying this. Not a soul around.

I decided rather than confront a mountain lion that I may surprise as a sole trekker on these paths, I sang all the way. This cavernous trek along the creek, with incredible rock faces on either side, interesting and unusual foliage all around and the encroaching sound of a waterfall...I can see why Doctor O had guided me here. I too, when reaching the fall, felt moved. I laughed out loud with surprise and joy at how beautiful it was. A little patch of beach and the lovely sounds, encased in the canyon rock all around.

At one point I seem to have lost the trail, but it appears once again and when the path becomes wider and clear, I know I am on the final stretch. Follow the red sandy soil...

I have a lovely coffee and omelette at a cafe that is built into the rock face- blink and you may miss out on this gem of a place but I had my guides that directed me here. I am with people and momentarily reminded that I am still part of planet earth. The view as I sup my coffee suggesting otherwise.

The pictures in Utah Rocks reveal the rest of the drive through Utah; from the scatterings of snow, to the endless and ever-changing formations and colours and gorgeous sun setting over monument valley, my heart was bursting with amazement at all I had seen. A parallel universe. Stopping for gas in Mexican Hat and the curious exchanges I had... I was baffled and wonderstruck by it all. 

I made it to Page, Arizona as night began to fall. No room at the inn scenario was not what I expected to deal with, but I found somewhere in this curious town and the woman was awesome. She helped me plan my morning, recommending a trail to run on and telling me about Horseshoe Bend- both amazing insider tips. I was here for Antelope Canyon alone (thank you, thank you, Nathan) and these were like a wonderful bonus prize. My run at 6am, as the sun rose, was filmic. I really cannot express what the landscape was like and how it felt to survey it, alone, running on a red sand trail. Here, once again, I was the only person. The only girl in the world. Horseshoe Bend was different but equally humbling. Cars had parked and many were walking across the desert towards this landmark, to catch this in the morning light. It was clear how this meander of the Colorado River got the name and although others were there felt as if it was some alien, a shared spectatorship of something other worldly. I was the only person alone. Two young chinese girls kindly snapped my photo. They were doing all sorts of cool poses and my pose felt somewhat tame but it was a relief to not have to selfie!

Antelope Canyon? A group tour involved a walk down and through this amazing slot canyon. The colours were harmonising, the peace soothing, the shafts of sunlight and shadows pure art. Creamy and smooth, rippled and undulating...

Our tour guide was cool. A First Nations man that had a few jokes up his sleeve and he kindly took photos of us all in the best spots. I made friends with an elderly Texan couple, who were shocked I was here alone. We shared a laugh- initially we were stuck behind two Asian girls that were dressed in flowing scarves, handbags in tow, and flimsy hats more suitable for Ladies Day at the races. This was a photo shoot opportunity and we lost them at one point having overtaken them) and our tour guide hoped they would find their way out- there really was only one way! Slot canyon single file and all that. I bid farewll to my Texan friends; they insisted I be cautious, drive safely and look after myself. I waved and hit the road. Next stop: Grand Canyon.

From the Grand Canyon, I hot footed it to Sedona. This was turning out to be quite the day!Initially the aim was to make it before nightfall but those damn beautiful rocks distracted me and I didn’t even make all of the lookout points of Grand Canyon! From the American highway with huge trucks encasing me on either side, to less modern roads with better views, I kept my foot down. My GPS took me down a horrific steep, twisty and turvy road with an intense amount of set backs.

Encroaching darkness had enveloped the world and the last droplets of sunset were the final flick of the switch that put my rocky world of wonder to rest. But hello neck tension as a result of 15 minute of ‘very likely moments of death by driving off a cliff face’ fear. When I reached the flat roads and entered a world of prettily lit up restaurants and shops, I laughed with relief and happiness to have made it. I had a mantra in my head all the way down, calling on my sister, Mama Wolff and Eve to guide me down and it had worked.

My GPS took me to White Bear Road and I settled into my air bnb where I went to bed almost immediately. I was upgraded from the trailer and would stay in the house with my hosts. As my mind played out some of the images that would surely leave an everlasting imprint in my visual memory, I had to breathe deeply to quell the flickers of the pictures that flashed through my mind. I felt overwhelmed emotionally/visually and physically tired from the drive I had undertaken.

I intended to use Sedona as a base in order to explore the surrounding areas. I had this desire to see ‘The Painted Desert’, not realising that I had been driving through the thick of it; yes, I was awestruck by the palette I was experiencing but figured that there would be a clear point in which I would see the striping of colours I had seen in photos. Although information was sort of unclear, I understood that the Petrified Forest which was eastern Arizona was where this (what I believed to be) elusive Painted Desert begins. A town called Holbrook is also in the midst of it, so having had left my Roomie back home with the last name of Holbrook (and a massive love for all things American), I felt compelled to come here as a surprise for him- hoping there would be a cool ‘Welcome to Holbrook’ sign. These states are rather large and even though I had my princess-mobile, it would be an epic drive from Sedona. Quite the mission. Staying here is Sedona was a knee jerk reaction after leaving myself with a few close shaves of being bed less and sleeping in the car (not the worst but being tired the from bad sleep would surely hinder hiking and exploring capabilities); I knew nothing of the place. I simply looked for cities or towns near Flagstaff (Flagstaff seemed too obvious, I wanted somewhere with a different spirit) after arriving to the ‘there is no room at the inn’ scenario in Page. I soon came to realise it was Sedona was an incredible gem. Now, I search for information and find it was perfect for me to come here:-

Sedona’s world-wide reputation as a spiritual mecca and global power spot has drawn some of our planet’s most amazing healers, intuitives, artists and spiritual guides. Come to Mother Nature’s red-rock temples to experience their life-transforming, soul-nourishing work in person. Sedona is a perfect place for spiritual and personal enrichment of the body and the soul.

What Makes Sedona So Special?

The majestic red rock scenery and evergreen vegetation are two reasons for the unique energy of Sedona and its tangible regenerative and inspirational effects. The red-orange color of the rock is one of the most neuro stimulating of colors. It enhances creative thinking and problem solving. Because Sedona is framed year round by green, visitors are also bathed in sense of hope and renewal, regardless of the season. The spectacular trails and overlooks provide numerous opportunities for prayer, and contemplation. Sedona is also internationally known for the uplifting power of its Vortex meditation sites. Two aspects of those sites make Sedona truly special.

My host was pretty certain I would love it and would maybe want to stay longer than the 3 nights I booked. I was debating when to head to LA to catch my flight to Fiji. Was it terribly ignorant to not even go to LA for a day or night? I was loving Arizona and Utah so much that I did feel inclined to stay for as long as possible- there was so much to explore and when would I be able to be here again? My host told me to vortex hop in the morning and see Sedona in sunlight- he felt I would probably want to forget LA and book my last two nights here. He was right. I didn't totally know what a vortex was or how to hop them but did not want to confess to this. My face may have given me away slightly and he said he had left me a map in my room. This is one explanation:

In Sedona vortexes are created, not by wind or water, but from spiraling spiritual energy. The vortexes of Sedona are named because they are believed to be spiritual locations where the energy is right to facilitate prayer, mediation and healing. Vortex sites are believed to be locations having energy flow that exists on multiple dimensions. The energy of the vortexes interacts with a person’s inner self. It is not easily explained. Obviously it must be experienced. 

I studied the vortex map and at the crack of dawn headed to the Main Street where there was a a lot of great eating spots. I got some snacks and was absolutley amazed with the scenery around. I had arrived in the pitch black and the colours I was seeing were STUNNING. I went straight to Bell Rock. It said on the guide that it was a short and easy walk. It was not necessary to climb the rock to feel the energy, being near the bottom you will see the twisted juniper trees- the more twisted, the stronger the energy. I am only in my flipflops. My trainers are in the boot of the car. A mile back. I want to climb. An elderly couple are coming down from a little climb. Where is the vortex? I want to know. I thought there may be a section of rock where it would be obvious. They said it is al very difficult to climb and scold me for my footwear. They had seen some hippy types heading up with chairs to go and meditate. They are skeptical. In fact, the lady feels a bit creeped out! I tell them I am just going to head up a little and maybe go back and get more appropriate footwear. 

After this picture, the flipflops were off. I scaled the whole thing barefoot. I do not know what came over me. I had to go up. I wrote a postcard from here, I was tucked in a little crevice and it felt amazing. I sat for ages. I heard some people below. It was a mother and father with two young boys. They were going to try and get up around the corner. I went with them. the kids were amazing- no fear and like spiderman. We all sat at the very tp and talked about travels. They thought it was hilarious I did it barefoot- very Sedona, the mother said. She said to her boys, if you ever want to go on a year trip, we will back you all the way. Cool. It was crazy going down. We slid some of it. People at the bottom were watching, impressed.

I go to the cathedral vortex and am astonished yet again. I take a long route around and meet two other hikers who tell me I am on the right track and to make sure I turn around and head back at 5:30 as they don't want to think of a young girl all alone in the dark. I scale some of the rock when I finally reach the vortex area but I take heed of the advice (also recalling Doctor O and his call to the police to rescue him come dark- I don't even know the number for rescue and my phone is on 1% battery...), turn round and meet others who have come to get the money shot of the sun dropping behind the rocks, in turn setting Cathedral Rock on fire. My phone died so I missed the shot but my pictures before give you the gist. I am recognised by a couple that must have been at Bell Rock earlier, and they tell some others, "This is her- the girl that climbed Bell Rock barefoot." They all look at my feet which are now in trainers and all I can think to say is, "Whatever you do, please don't tell my mum!"

I hit a Thai Restaurant that I had spotted right near home. What better way to end this fabulous day? The maitre-d presumes that I will take out. Nope, I say, Iwant to have dinner in. Why not? she smiles. I connect with my waiter who clocks this conversation and gives me a sweet wink. He is big smiles and comments on the postcards I write, helping me choose from the menu. We chat and he asks if I want to be shown some of the great secret spots here. Sure. I am more than enthusiastic. There is a hitch. He wants $100. He will do it as a guided 1 on 1 tour. Our conversation falls flat. He must see my face. He changes tune slightly and says he will do a good price for me. We had been gassing and getting on like a house on fire up to this point. I do not want to offend him but $100 seems crazy. I mean I am unsure if this is normal in Sedona and I make a mental note to ask the airbnb hosts as soon as I can. I tell him I have to think about it and tomorrow I have plans. I want to go to Holbrook to surprise my buddy back home. His last name is Holbrook and it is near the Petrified Forest. I want to see the sunrise here as it is the start of the Painted Desert. What's in Holbrook? Come on, Jessica, you are in Sedona! He says, throwing his hands in the air. Maybe we could get together Friday, he suggests. He gives me his card.  I study it in the car. He is 'The Wellness Counselor'. He provides 'Integrative and Intuitive Healing, Nutritional and Spiritual Empowerment'.  On the back of the card there is stuff about 'Anti-Aging and Optimal HEalth Protocol'. His wellness sessions include: Ionic Footbath Detox, Supplements, Massage and Counselling, Spirit Quests, Hiking, Training, meditation and Prayer. There are more details on the card but it ends with, 'Schedule a session now! We are a team of Angelic Light beings. To Serve You. Bliss You.' I check out his website and begin to understand more of what Sedona is like. People very much on spiritual quests and quite unusual paths. My waiter is evidently not just a waiter. I feel perplexed. I am on a spiritual journey but do I want this? Could it be amazing? No. It all feels wrong. And expensive. I feel in spirit enough, just being here in these magical lands. 

I ask Braja and Chandra. Braja scoffs about the amount of money- he knows my waiter as he has come to some Kirtan sessions. He says that a lot of these types get all tripped out and go wild in the desert, claiming they are taking natural highs from the desert offerings which are in fact and effect, drugs. He said he should have just offered to show me around for free. I email and politely decline. He says he will be at the Buddhist getting very deep into things and I should head up. We have a few emails and actually he is very lovely. In the end it is no longer about the money and a guide but about the mutual bond I know we both felt that night in the restaurant. He invites me to some 'normal' activities too- popping in to see him at the restaurant, going to see a band after he finishes waitering. I have my own agenda and I am enjoying my Sedona time alone and it never quite works out. 

I did set out on my crazy one woman mission to see Holbrook and the sun rise in The Petrified Desert. I got up at 4:15 and set off. I was at the closed gates into the National Park at 6:45. They open at 7:00am. I had no coffee and the sun had risen. The man at the toll was very surprised to see me when I drove through and arrived at his booth at 7:01. I drove to see the sun rise in the painted desert, I announce. He is a little confused and it turns out that all the places I have been around over the past days are part of this painted desert. Oh. I look at the map he has fiven me. I spot a cafe at the end of the road through the forest. I ask him to recommend a short walk and then I will hit up the cafe. I am dying for a coffee. Gee, I am sorry, Miss. The cafe doesn't open till 9. It was pretty bleak. Only a 15 minute drive through with a few stop offs and possible walks. It was cold, the desert sun not having had chance to warm the land. I was the only person here. I saw some petroglyphs but the photograph is taken from the information board, they are all roped off so you can only just see. The ones back in St George, when Chris took Doctor O and I into the rocky lands were far more amazing. But there was something amazing about this 'forest'. It looked like an outer space movie set.

This is my lone car and I am stood, alone. There are markers to show where, in the distance, the San Francisco Peaks Mountain Range. There is a little breeze and other than that, the world is without sound. I drive back through Holbrook, desperately looking for something cool or a place for coffee. I end up getting a caffeine fix from the gas station. The 'Holbrook Inn' looks rather depressing with the broken sign and this place feels strange. I want to get back to Sedona!

As I begin to make my way back on the highway, I see the sign that had caught my attention when I drove in the early hours: 'Best Preserved Meteorite Crater on Earth'. I almost turn off. I need the bathroom and I have come all this way so it seems like I should. I miss my chance but then there is another turn off. I do it. It is strange. I have to pay over $20 but I get a free 'Subway' cookie (yes, here in the middle of absolutely nowhere, the cafe consists of a subway) and I can go on a guided tour that starts in 15 minutes. I decide not to do that. I feel exhausted and slightly bemused by the random collection of people here. The sweet guy in the gift shop seems alarmed I am alone and insists I watch the movie that is 10 minutes long. It explains about the meteorite real good, he says. I head in. It is pretty interesting. Very sensationalist, however, with a booming American voiceover. But, it is actually pretty sensational. I eat my cookie while looking at the crater and then I hit the road.

When I return to Sedona, I decide to head to the Airport vortex with some writing. I am soooo tired and I have no idea whether the energy at this vortex is in the mix too, but I leave immediately and head back to Bell Rock. I take a different route and clamber through fairytale grass lands, a few wrong turns and eventually emerge from the desert foliage to rest upon a rock.

When I leave Bell Rock, I am happy to see the moon. It looks perfect hung in the air beside this formation.

I returned to the airport vortex knowing that I had not been in the frame of mind to experience it the previous day. I took some birthday cards that needed writing. I sat at the top with a few other people who were all taking in the view, a few appeared to be meditating and some just resting from the steep but short push to the top. A youngish boy, perhaps around 17, had arrived as I was preparing to leave. He was special, quite possibly on the autistic spectrum, and with a man I presumed to be his father. His name was Eddie. He was staring at me and I smiled. I saw him note that I was barefoot and carrying my shoes. I stood and surveyed the area, drinking in deep the enchantment of the lands and that vortex energy. Eddie’s dad was telling him it was time to go, but he was transfixed by my movements. I had sat down to put my shoes back on and Eddie began to take his shoes off as his dad tried to stop him. Eddie was still staring and ignoring his dad, pushing him aside as he took his socks off too. He came towards me and I wondered for a moment what he would do. His dad tried to stop him but Eddie was resolute; he walked right up to me, sat beside me and stared. His father looked desperate and was apologising, raising his eyebrows in a manner which suggested that I was to know Eddie was different to us.

I greeted them both and asked them if they were enjoying the view. I told Eddie how nice it was to have bare feet on the rocks but for walking down you certainly need shoes on. I asked his dad if they were on holiday as Eddie remained silent at my side, just staring and still. Hi dad said they were here for Eddie, for treatment. There was a desperation, sadness and a fear in this man- fear of Eddie’s potential behaviour, I presumed. I explained to Eddie that I was going and I was putting my shoes back on and wished them both a a nice day. I got talking to a couple ladies walking down and stood in the immediate car park with them. Edie appeared as I was about to take the path off this car park for the short hike to the second one. Eddie’s dad was trying to stop him but Eddie was making a determined bee line for me, hitting out at his father and telling him to ‘Leave us alone,’ and uttering that he hated him. His dad appeared helpless, frightened and sheltered himself from the blows , helpless in the way that he felt things had spiralled out of control. I came towards them saying to the father, ‘Does Eddie want to say hello to me? That is fine.’ I moved to Eddie, telling him who I was and what I was doing here, how much I liked Sedona. I asked Eddie if this was his dad and he muttered, repeatedly, “He is no relation.’  I tried to speak gently to Eddie, telling him a few more things about my travels and realised that perhaps drawing his father in was probably a good idea, as Eddie’s display of violence and denial of their relationship had left him somewhat on the outskirts. I hoped that by including him, displaying kindness towards him may quell Eddies’s animosity. Figuring it was time to round things up I said how nice it was to meet them both, in an attempt to show Eddie that I saw his father as a friend too, I shook both their hands, wishing them well. Eddie continued to stare but had calmed. His dad’s hand, when I held it, was shaking. He said, “Thank you. Thank you.”

It was sort of intense and I wondered what effect the vortex and the masculine energy it supposedly exudes had contributed to the events. The day continued with some Sedona experiences. My next stop was a vortex yet unvisited and a possible hike in the surrounding area. When I reached the car park, an elderly gent, who was whistling, came straight up to me with an opener of, “It sure is a beautiful day.” Yep, sure is. He gave me a sandstone flat rock cut into the shape of a heart. “To represent the unconditional love that is present in the world,” he told me. Wow. It is lovely, I say. I wonder if he is selling it and how much he wants me to pay him for it, but he moves on and bestows the same gift and similar words on a woman I am parked beside and who is returning to her car. I realise he has a satchel, full of these hearts. She is accepting and immediately grateful; quite possibly without the fleeting thought I had of monetary exchange/what is the catch. “That is so nice,” she says to me. We chat about the vortex. This is her favourite one because it possesses feminine energies.She writes and sits up there for hours in meditation. She lives in Minnesota now and is visiting her friends back here and loves Sedona. It seems everyone here, all shapes, sizes, appearances, are in tune with this sort of stuff. 

I climb the area around the vortex and rock climb to a perch where no one else is.

I look at the rock formation opposite, where some have gathered and are sitting in the shade, sheltered from the midday desert sun and no doubt, either in meditation or having a rest. I realise that the elderly man who had bequeathed me my sandstone heart was at the top of the formation and he made an announcement: “This song is for the land around.” Then he played a beautiful song on his flute.

I captured one on my phone. It was supposed to represent courage. We meet on the hike down; he approaches me with the same opening line and I told him that he had already given me the lovely gift and how much I enjoyed his musical performance.

He tells me that he had a calling to spread unconditional love here because that is the simplest thing you can give. We talk about  the shared belief that we both have in the Universe and there being something more than just us- God and the names that we may apply to it are irrelevant for us. We both agree that there is something: the source, the Dao, a fragment of this universe in everyone and in this way we all connected. I like this and have thought so much on this recently. It strikes a chord. Deeply. This man surmounted on the same vortex, sometimes twice a day, playing the same tunes and gifting the people he passes. He talks about how he was hanging the hearts in the trees, only to be taken to court for that so he has resigned himself to handing them out. As he moves on I hear him explaining to the ladies who had crossed our path, the amount of times he was taken to court because he was decorating trees with the sandstones. When he is just trying to spread unconditional love, he says. So I guess not all Sedona types are open to this type of sentiment. I wonder if these rock displays are his work:

I started a hike but had to turn back as I would join my airbnb hosts (and any others that showed up) for a bit of chanting. Yoga in the form of mantras, guitar and song. And a slap up vegetarian meal to share after. Pashan and Basha offer free sessions here and their morning yoga is chanting and singing. I get quite into it- why not? I mean, I miss yoga (as I know it- more movement and less song!) but the people here have no judgement. Everyone is welcome and having a good old sing song is cathartic and liberating. I meet a Japanese woman who has come for the first time to these open sessions and she tells a story of a hike earlier in the day. She ended up climbing a rock, quite unclimbable by her account, but the fear of the rattlesnake that beside her foot made her shoot up like a gecko. Getting down without further annoying the deadly snake was difficult and she tried to talk to it, through her mind. As she reasoned, the snake does not talk words and she does not talk snake. So subliminally she tried to send it a message. A huge yellow butterfly then flew past her and banged right into the brim of her cap she was wearing. It was odd enough that at this height and in this moment to be confronted by a butterfly, but one so huge, so bright yellow and so ungraceful. She managed to get down. She has myself and the others at the table quite captivated by her story, her accent, her English, her mannerisms make us all laugh. She has a story to tell, it is a great story, she tells it well! talk a little of my barefoot hike and where I have just been. When we wash our plates, she tells me that I look like someone in a fairytale because of my dress and hair- so she feels surprised and likes that I am a lone adventurer too! I stay my last night in the trailer, where I had actually booked to be. I loved it.

I leave the next morning early, heading to the walk I did not finish. I have to get in one last Sedona fix before I make my way to Las Vegas. I decide to stay somewhere outside of Vegas, just see how far I can get- it is a decent drive from Sedona. 

The hike is amazing and I climb what initially looks an impossible rock face. I am on the top and it is like a magical garden. Soft mint green grasses and trees.The pastel colours are lovely and once again I have this feeling of being the only girl in the world- I am the only girl surmounted on this rock, that is absolutely certain.

I drive, my feet red from the rocks and sandy paths. I drive and drive. I take a slight detour to see some of Route 66.

I make it to Boulder City. It is 25 minutes to LAs Vegas from here. It is 5:30. Boulder City sounds like the perfect place to end my rocky road trip. There is some sort of festival on and I am unsure where there will be a place to stay. A woman in a fully booked hotel helps me. She calls to ‘Sands Inn’ motel and tells whoever she speaks to that she is sending a lovely young lady her way. Sleeping in the car or heading to the big city would not have been ideal on this night- I had to do the dreaded pack after living out of the boot of my car for some time.

‘Sands Inn’ is perfect, the lady helps me with a parcel I need to send to get to Mama Wolff for her birthday. I leave her cash that I hope to cover it and we Namaste each other. I go and watch the sunset.

It looks intergalactic and the protective angel that sits on the gates to the city glimmers in the last light.

I pack and watch loads of ‘Criminal Minds’ episodes in my little motel room. Probably not a good idea when you are alone but the motel owner had told me that I was in one of the top 10 safest cities of America. It is well policed and I would be fine walking alone at night to catch the sunset. Sure enough, the next morning when I headed out for my last run on American soil, I get confused as to the way back and there is an officer on a bicycle (eating a donut) and he directs me.

I head back to Vegas to drop my car, hitting whole foods one last time. I concoct an awesome pack up for the Boltbus. I meet an Australian bloke and we swap details- he will show me around Melbourne if I make it there. So I am briefly in LA and it looks pretty cool. The station is a beautiful building and I head to the bus for the airport. I had skyped with Mama Wolff from the motel and then managed to skype with Mama Liz from the airport. Next part of the trip coming up. I frantically write as I sit waiting for the flight. No doubt Fiji would full of stories that I would want to commit to my blog and I was way behind. My last snapshot of America and this continent, taken from the window of the bus as planes flew in and took off from LAX. The palm trees looked like balloons, sihouetted in the setting sun which had created a ribbon of colours, merging and changing. The balloons gently swayed. My own farewell party. This was a lovely send off, my own little thoughts in this big, wide world. These wondrous places I had just been and had experienced new universes, galaxies, planets and how it felt to be the only girl in the world.